Sometimes Love Means Letting Go

Brene Brown Quote about Integrity

As an ode to a beautifully inspiring post by Dr. Andrea Dinardo I have borrowed a phrase…

Stand your Sacred Ground.

Stand your Sacred Ground.

Stand your Sacred Ground.

My intuition kept whispering to me…

You’ve had this argument before.

You know this is fear and resistance speaking from the other end of this conversation.

Walk away before you add fuel.

So I did. I have before, but this time was different. This time, rather than defending my integrity, and making my points, I spoke my truths and walked away with my integrity in tact. I simply gave them a hug and stopped giving a reason to resist. It was not the comfortable choice, it won’t be the easy choice to live with right now. But it will be the choice I will be proud of later.

I’m fiercely loyal and passionately curious about the human condition. I have a strong circle of relationships around me that share those qualities and usually join me in the darkest vulnerable places in order to see the bright meadow on the other side. I’m so very grateful to have my tribe. Then there are the relationships that no matter what you do it’s never enough, or it’s too much. You drift apart. I always try to real it back in, be more attentive, more honest, more curious, more loving. That has always done well for me. Not because it works, but because sometimes it doesn’t . For me, the greatest emotional pain lies in letting go of people. Not just any people. The ones that know me. The ones I’ve laughed with, struggled with, cried with, shared stories and experiences with.

My fear bellowed from the depths…

Maybe they never really knew me.

Maybe they did but didn’t want to anymore.

Maybe it was me.

But my herculean spirit was stronger…

Stand your Sacred Ground.

Know your truth.

Trust your light.

For many of us, the brave road is to fight through something, to work through it. I value that. Through conflict and struggle our cards are on the table and our warrior inside revealed. We learn what we’re made of, where to set boundaries and when to push through difficulties. But other times, we learn when we’re fighting a losing battle. When we have to love ourselves and our values MORE than loving another person. There’s a very fine line between enabling someone to treat you poorly and allowing them to feel however they need to feel. When you become the object of their resentment or the target for their blame it may be time to lovingly walk away. It’s not healthy, nor is loving what you expect them to be. We all deserved to be loved exactly as we are. Sometimes that means letting go. Sometimes that’s the best kind of love we can give someone.

ac5f1d63cac89db64819696ae4a18584                                                                    Brene Brown, PhD

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10 thoughts on “Sometimes Love Means Letting Go

  1. This resonates with me too. I never let go, and then I’m let down repeatedly. I do also try to be better and salvage the friendship. In honesty, I have very few friends and I feel I cannot afford to lose them, but there is also this strong sense of loyalty I have in me. But sometimes it is a losing battle, as you say, and you need to put yourself and your values first.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Someone said to me once “friendships are like tissue boxes. You can 10 around you but when your really sad only one wipes your tears.” It doesn’t mean you lost 9, it means you really only had 1. You can’t lose the ones that are truly your friends. Love and hugs 💖💙😌

      Liked by 1 person

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